Mission: Real Red Velvet Cake!
   Ya herd me, Real red velvet cake, let me explain. Most of you have been led to believe that red velvet cake is chocolate cake with a container of red coloured goop food colouring added to it, to make it extra delicious I suppose. Don't get me wrong, I'm not against food colouring, I'm just not sure where along the line it became so delectable. After all it doesn't really taste.
   Well let me tell you of a story involving a cousin of the carrot cake, a chocolate cake made with beets.  Sounds weird, I know, but this is real red velvet cake. Today I made some for the first time (after a lengthy wait due to procrastination and lack of beets) and let me tell you, it was delicious. I have to admit though that somehow it was less red than the fake red velvet cake, and I'm alright with that.

   I bet you want the recipe. I used one from a magazine as inspiration but I can never really follow a recipe… (I just chose not to.)

2 cups   Gluten free flour mix
1 cup     cocoa
2 tsp      baking powder
1tsp       baking soda
1/2 tsp   salt
2 cups   beet puree- (Roast, peel, and pulverize in food processor.)
1 1/2     cups sugar
1 cup    melted butter
1/2 cup  plain yogurt
1 tsp     vinegar
2 tsp     vanilla
4           eggs
1 tbsp    psyllium fibre (Bulk Barn carries this stuff, it holds the cake together)

   Pre-heat oven to 350F and butter your tins. Sift all dry ingredients together, cocoa and baking soda are always lumpy. In a mixer, combine beet puree, sugar, butter, yogurt, vinegar, vanilla and psyllium fibre. Let stand for about 3 min. Then add dry ingredients and mix, pour into pans and bake. I used 3 smaller round ones and baked for about thirty minutes. You should probably let them cool, I could have waited longer, my icing is kinda melty...

Here is the giant beet Eric gave us, from his garden.

Here is the beets after roasting and pulverizing.

And here are the baked cakes! So tasty and moist!

   When you are crafty like me Halloween can be a busy time. Often some poor soul comes a knocking, looking for me to create a magical themed costume for two, in less than a week, for no more than eternal gratefulness. I know it's hard to imagine, but this is not always possible. The poor soul customarily leaves with an amazingly executed, guise attaining, borrowed costume that did in fact take months to make (last year) and cost about two months worth of groceries.
 

This year something happened. Someone needed my help and I was able to produce!

   I think they turned out first rate. I was only in charge of the headwear, thankfully, or I may not have agreed. This project will eat half a day, if you are like me and have most of the small supplies on hand already, and have a sewing machine all set up and prepared to sew. If you do not have these luxuries, prepare to order pizza for dinner because you'll be here all day. In the event you would like to proceed anyhow and recreate these cherished 'Minion' toques, I'm including a tutorial with lots of pictures.

Start with a trip to the fabric store for some yellow fleece. I bought 1/2 a metre. Then make a rectangle that wraps all the way around your head but not too tight. Sew up a simple toque with a nice rounded top. I then used an awl (pointy stabber thingy) to start some holes for the bits of pipe cleaner to go through. You want to cut the pipe cleaners twice as long as you want the hair, and poke both pointy ends through to the top of the hat (so there are no sharp ends poking your head). 

Now comes the part where we dig through the kitchen to find some canning jar rings in different sizes, hopefully silver coloured. As you can see from the pictures, it's starting to look hopeful already!

Here I acquired some enlarged minion eyeballs, printed them out, glued them to cardboard (I used spray adhesive), and trimmed them so they fit just snug inside the lower edge of the canning ring. Do not glue them in until you add some 'lenses' to the goggles with transparencies (you could repurpose a strawberry or muffin plastic clamshell type container instead). Just some dabs of super glue on the top inside edge to glue in the lens, and then snugly fit in the cardboard backing eye, adding a few more dabs of superglue to keep it in place. Looking good! All it needs now is a band!

   I whipped up the band on the sewing machine out of some black sweatshirt type material and sewed some  extra yellow tabs that are to be glued to the back of the eye for extra durability, while the ends of the black bands are glued to the side of the goggle for style. I used Gorilla Glue epoxy that dries crystal clear, some elastics to keep it all in place while drying, and a book to weigh it down so the back tabs glue properly (as you can see from the photos). To add it to the toque, I simply tacked it with a few hand stitches in three places so the goggles can be easily removed if you need to wash the hat.

And that is all you need! 

Ok, maybe not. 

You do need the rest of the outfit, but now your halfway there!

Being sick.

   Usually being sick is associated with that reducing feeling of shame as you contemplate the possibility of staying home and spending the day taking care of yourself. This is immediately followed by the sense of gloom as the realization comes that no such magical day shall take place. Of course there is always work projects, pressures of co-workers,  family needs, blah blah blah. (I think we can place all of those reasons in a bin and label it excuses.)
   What if one glorious day you were sick and you did what your heart wanted. You stayed in bed, watched movies, drank tea, made soup, took a nap, read a book, had a hot bath, took another nap. What would happen?
   Don't get me wrong, this sort of happiness does take commitment. You will feel guilty (mostly self imposed) and at first it will be tough to hang about in bed. Remain steadfast. It will get easier. The dishes will call your name, be sure to turn up the volume on the T.V. Your spouse may wonder what's for dinner. If you just go back to napping long enough, they will go away, if not eat your soup. You may have to face friends, relatives and mail delivery persons in your pyjamas. This is all part of letting people know your new attitude.
   You are important. Taking care of yourself is important. Others are motivated to make you feel bad about this only because they do not afford themselves the same luxuries. I swear your life will change. When you treat yourself better, others will treat you better.

   Start right now and make a list of all the things you will do next time a cold comes along. When it does you will be excited! Your dreams may come true! Someone does care about you!

   Imagine, slow music moving into scene, emotional strings building up, the first character enters…

   I think I may be a movie director already. Francis and I (on Francis' insistence,) have created our first stop motion animation movie! I feel like we are pros. Just look at the results and see for yourself! -But before you do, you may want to pop some pop-corn, get comfortable.

   What did I tell you? Pretty glorious. 

Pretty sure we were made for this. Let's face it, we have all the props. Maybe not All the props, I now find it necessary  to purchase The Hobbit 'The Lonely Mountain' Lego set, if only for the sake of art. Great use of a Sunday. 

   Why do I love Halloween so much? Is it taking free candy from strangers? Probably.
   Maybe it's more about the unspoken pact between friends, neighbours and strangers that everyone has a 'free pass'. It's alright to act a little weird and crazy, It's ok to parade around town dressed as a gnome, looking more than a little bizarre with chocolate smeared all over your face and the rush that comes along with getting something for free and arising sugar fuelled frenzy. Perhaps for others it's more about fuelling this aforementioned frenzy.
   I suppose there are others still, who feel they do not participate yet cannot withstand the urge to point out the outrageousness of the holiday, stating that they are way above all things funny and/or silly. To them I say: good for you, and good day. We already know you are a stick in the mud, no need to point it out.
 
   Big question: what to wear! Most years I get really enthusiastic in July I decide on an elaborate hand sewn costume (for two, of course) made of lavish fabrics, feathers, foam and furs. Around August I realize I can't afford this, and around September I run out of time. Today is the day I realize it's only two weeks away and no costumes have been made. I guess I could always throw on an old costume…

   It hasn't always been this way. I have made Queen of hearts- King of spades (with matching dog costumes), a pair of honey bees, a pair of penguins, a chicken and The Colonel KFC, some last minute gnomes.

 The trouble with Halloween is that I'm always having so much fun, I forget to take a picture of my costume! It's either at the end of the party when I'm really hot and I have hiked my penguin costume up to my knees, or the day after the party, getting ready to hand out candy to the little kids and heckle the big ones. These photos were all I could rustle up, the pickings were slim… and fuzzy.

   An even better reason to get goin' and get sewing; so I can actually take a good photo this year. I hope this inspires you, you still have two weeks, lots of time to rekindle your spirit, your inner youth and get together the best costume yet! Don't worry, a party will find you, Halloween knows.

   Who doesn't have a stamp of their own face?
   I know for a fact that there are others out there who do indeed have a stamp of their shining faces. So what if I'm the one who made it and gave it as a gift? The point is, I am now a proud owner of my very own face as well!

Below is a stamp of my sister Rachel and her mister.

How did Rachel get her face on two stamps?

Here she is again, this time with me!

Here is me and Francis on the tandem!

Oh, and here is Jade, picking her nose.

   All in all I feel pretty good about the way they all turned out. Who knows why it took me so long to make one of myself! Of course I would love to make a stamp for everyone I know,  gifting the world with strange and useless items. I need you to know that each stamp takes four to five hours. That in mind, I could be swayed to make one for you, if the right item for barter is offered…

   When your partner or child opens the mail and sees this aforementioned stamp and exclaims "What did she Carve a stamp of her Own Face!?", you may reply: "Why yes, she did!"

It's happening again.

   I started up again and may not be able to stop this time. I just can't stop burning spoons. (Who can really?) There is something about the smell of the burning wood and paying the price of the craft with burnt fingers. Recently I discovered that it's possible to burn cork in a similar way. Hot matts here I come! Don't even get me started on the possibilities for cutting boards. Holy Frijoles, I just considered salad bowls. Oh no.

Gardeners do know all the dirt. And no, that's not a 'dig' at any gardeners I know. 

By the way, is this a spoon?  Flat spoon?  

Scrapey spoon?

Scroon?

Spatula spoon?

Spatoon?

I need to know.